France During Covid
Post originally written in August 2020
My First 2 months in France during Covid and how life began
WHAT’S YOUR STORY? GET IT OFF YOUR CHEST….prompted by a writing group
It has been almost 2 months that I have been sitting in an apartment in the beautiful city of Aix-en-Provence. I came here to be with my daughter, who is 16 and goes to school in Aix. She has been a boarding student for 2 years, and life was looking great. She loved it, and we loved that she was settled after a few years of constant moving, due to a busy expat life. Covid changed everything.
My husband and I of 32 years separated just before the summer of last year. He is French.and I am American. I decided to return to the U.S. after 30 years abroad. I am from Boston but decided that I would head south and enjoy the weather and the beach. So, off I went to Sarasota, Florida. Life in Sarasota was very easy and after 30 years outside of the country, I couldn't believe how easy and natural it felt to be back. I loved the nightlife, the food, the friendliness of the people, and just the general ease of living in my own country. I didn't know anyone when I arrived, but after meeting just one woman via a contact back home, I was off and running and had a friend to go and explore with. We both loved music, so we often headed out to wherever there was a band or two on the menu.
Life was easy. Life was fun. I had found a job teaching ESL (English as a Second Language) at a school in the area. This kept me busy and gave me purpose. During my free time, I went around taking pictures of all of the beautiful sites that one can find in Sarasota and its surrounding areas. Sunsets to die for,. beach walks that soothed the soul, and smiling faces everywhere. Everyone seems happy and relaxed in Sarasota. . I loved the vibe and life was good. It was a big deal that I had moved back "home.". It was a difficult decision and I felt proud that I could make all of this work without too much difficulty.
Christmas came, and my daughters planned to visit. It was our first Christmas as a "broken" family. My eldest from Amsterdam, my youngest from France and the middle one from Los Angeles were all booked and ready to see what Mom's new life was like in Florida. We had a great time discovering the area and I loved showing off this new home that I had found. I think they really liked it. They wouldn't commit, but I could tell they were pleased. Being from Boston, Cape Cod had always been their second home. Summers were always spent at Grandma and Grandpa's house. Florida needed some getting used to.
We had a great visit, and we all said our teary goodbyes. It was so hard to see them go, not knowing when the next time would be. As it would turn out, that Christmas together would be the last bit of normal we would have for a long time. January came and went, and as I was teaching some kids from China, there was a lot of talk about this new virus that was circulating. At that time, I/we were all pretty sure that it would stay in China, and there was no way it would ever hit us.
January was fun at work. I had a bunch of kids that came for summer camp from South America. They were all very upbeat and so excited to be in the U.S., mainly to do sports camp, but the English bit was just a little bonus at the end of their day. It was a pleasure, and I really enjoyed it.
February came, and I got sick. It wasn't Covid but, we were all cautious, and I didn't return to work until I was 100%,. A couple of the kids I taught had been sick, and we were all struggling with the typical winter bug. I think I went back to work one time after that illness, and before I knew it, there was no more work. Schools were closing, and even though we kept saying "let's wait and see," things just never returned to normal.
Meanwhile, in France, they were ahead of us with this virus. I was getting updates from my daughter, and France seemed to have everything under control. "No, the schools will not close and boarding houses were staying open, but they were taking precautions. By the end of the first week, we woke to a new story every day. There was more and more talk about closing down school and the boarding house. Nothing was clear. I decided to move out of my very tiny downtown accommodation and look for a bigger place in the event that my daughter would need to come and spend the next few months with me. Even if it meant homeschooling. As luck would have it, I found a beautiful condo on the beach on Longboat Key. It was available for a steal because the snowbirds had to head back before the virus got any worse. I negotiated a great price and promised to stay until December when the northerners usually returned. I couldn't believe my luck. I was in a huge condo in a private beach community. The day I moved in was the same day that they closed all of the public beaches in Florida. My timing couldn’t have been better. So, there I sat with my ocean view and beautiful sunsets every evening while I waited for news from France. I was all ready for Pia to arrive when I got a call from her, asking if she could stay with a friend. She had been invited by her best friend at the boarding house to spend some time at her home. Her Mom was on her way from their home in South Africa and was moving to their home in France. The Mom is French and was literally moving back to France from S.A. when Covid hit. My husband and I decided that this was a nice idea because, at that time, it seemed easy and we liked that she'd be in France with a friend. The Mom who invited her also seemed to like this idea, and so we went with that. We had a big discussion about the fact that it could be at least 2 weeks and that hopefully it wouldn't be much longer. As we all know, 2 weeks became 2 months. A few days after Pia arrived at her friend's house, my husband got word that the borders in Morocco, where he lives, were closed. It happened without notice. He would spend the next 4 months in quarantine in his city apartment and working out of his house. He could only leave for a quick supermarket shop that was highly regulated, and there were no exceptions.
I am not a French citizen, so I could not just jump on a plane and get over to France to be with my daughter. I spent most days in my beautiful new accommodation trying to figure out how Pia and I would get together. Days became weeks, weeks became months. After 2 months at her friend's house, it was becoming clear that life was getting difficult. The Mom and the 2 girls were finding the big house in the country a bit too small. They were confined there and there was little to do. We, who were outside of France, felt helpless. We had no way to get to her. We didn't know what to do. The girls had spent the 2 months trying to keep up with school via their online classes, I could feel from afar that things were becoming strained. It was just all too weird and there seemed to be no end in sight. It was clearly time for a Plan B.
At the end of 2 months in the country, Pia was invited to move in with another family who lived in Aix. We agreed that this was a good change and this new Mom knew that I was working on a plan to get over to France. The girls would see out the school year and hopefully by then we’d have a solution. Pia changing houses was a good option for everyone. The first family was wonderful and very gracious, but I think a change was needed for all. Pia was a fresh face and a companion for her friend in the new house and it gave space to the lovely mother and daughter who had been so kind to Pia in the country house. This move also coincided with France lifting the quarantine and allowing for a little more movement. So, Pia was back in Aix and able to go into town and see her friends. The timing was perfect.
I was finally able to reach someone at the Consulate in Miami. It took days to get through, but once I finally did, they were very helpful and I got the answers I needed to confirm that I would be able to fly to France. I just needed to be sure to have my marriage certificate with me. In fact, I could've gone all along, but it wasn't something I was willing to take a chance on. There were so many unknowns. So, my husband mailed me all of the papers I needed, and I booked my flight. I said goodbye to my new colleagues at work and spread the news to the few people I had met in Sarasota. I felt defeated as I'd done so much to get my life going there, and it lasted for such a short time. Equally, I couldn't wait to be back together with my daughter. Our separation had gone on long enough, and with this sudden knowledge that jumping on an airplane was not an option I just wanted to get over there. I didn't like the fact that my 16-year-old daughter was stuck in France with no family nearby.
So, on July 1, I flew to France. I drove myself to Sarasota airport. I checked in with all my papers and started the long journey back to Europe. I first flew to Atlanta, where I had a 6-hour layover. I have never seen an airport so empty. I went directly to the International terminal and spent the whole day in the lobby, that I shared with one other person.. I could hear the relaxing music and the bathrooms were so clean it felt like being home. There was a Starbucks open and a gift shop which also sold sandwiches and the like. I have never felt so relaxed in an airport. It was a wonderful but very surreal experience. No people. Anywhere!!!
About 2 hours before the flight, people started to trickle into the terminal. It turns out that there were two flights that evening—one to Paris and the other to Amsterdam. I was headed to Amsterdam. I did this purposely to avoid any conflict at the busy Paris airport. CDG is often bustling, but as I found out later, the flights to Paris were not as full as my flight to Amsterdam. The flight went well, and I had no one next to me. It wasn't empty, but it was spacious. Everyone had their own row to sleep. Finally, after a relatively painless trip across the pond, I found myself back in the country that I had I called home for many years (The Netherlands). Amsterdam, Schiphol is so familiar that it felt good to be back, even if only in the airport. My oldest daughter lives in Amsterdam, and it was frustrating to know that she was so close but that there was no way to see her. Oh well. My last leg of the journey was finally in sight. I only had a short flight to Marseille where I would, at long last, be reunited with Pia. It had been over six months since we'd seen each other. We had been texting throughout the day as I updated her on my various comings and goings. She was so excited and was busy getting herself installed in our new apartment. She'd gone shopping for food with her very kind host family, and they had helped her to move in. She would be waiting when I arrived, and she decided that it was best to quarantine with me and be together instead of knowing I was here and not able to see me.
At long last, I arrived in Marseille. Upon entering customs, the customs officer looked at my passport and looked panicked when he realized that I was American. They had just that day declared that Americans were no longer permitted to travel to France for "unnecessary" travel. He looked at me and said, "You are American! What am I going to do with you?" He asked me to wait while he went and consulted with his colleagues. After many questions about why I was there and lots of worried looks going back and forth, they finally waved me through. Phew!! I was worried there for a minute. After three flights and a long day behind me, I really didn't want to be denied entry.
I got my bags and went outside to find a taxi. “Bonjour Madame!” Yes, I was back. I had a lovely driver take me into Aix. I couldn't wait to see Pia and discover where we'd be living for the next two years. She had chosen a place in the city center because what 16 years old wouldn't want to live in the heart of the city?
After winding through some very tiny streets, we finally found our way into Rue Nostro Seigne. It is a one-way street and is just wide enough for a car to get through. Even the driver didn't know how to get there. He found it, and before long, I was looking up the stairs to a very happy Pia. She couldn't wait for me to come up and see the new place. After four months of living with host families, she had her own room and her own Mom! What could be better? It was a great reunion, and I really loved the place. We were chatting away while I looked around the apartment, and suddenly I noticed that there were no sheets on the bed nor were there any towels. The apartment was fully furnished, so I was expecting to have everything we needed. Oops!!! Where was I again? Oh yeah……….hmmmm. I made a quick call to the property agent and asked about the linens. I got my first "It's not possible." "Oh no, Madame, we don't do that for long-term rentals." Whaaaaat?!!!! AAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!! I was exhausted and just wanted to take a shower. The next thing she said was, "Go to Monoprix. They have sheets and towels there". Yeah, just what I wanted to do after a 24-hour journey from the U.S. Does anyone understand what that's like?! When I told her that I wasn’t supposed to leave the apartment because of quarantine, she quickly responded “Don't worry. Wear a mask". I felt very uncomfortable with this idea because I was told that I had to self-quarantine without question. But, we needed sheets and towels, so off we went. Pia knew her way around, thank goodness. Boy, was Aix crowded! I hadn’t seen crowds like that in months.
Finally in Monoprix, we found the home department. I was looking at an unorganized sheet department that looked like a jumble sale. I had no idea what size the beds were. I could never get it right over here. 160? 180? 200? With no choice and no idea what to buy, I ended up grabbing two bath mats and told Pia that we were going home to figure this out. I, meanwhile, was just about ready to pass out. When we got home, the woman at the agency arrived with some things to get us through. We also found a couple of sheets amongst Pia's belongings. As she was a boarder, she had some of her stuff, but like any 16 year old, she didn't think about it until much later.
Ahhhhh. We were sorted out. Pia made burgers and salad (which I thought was very cute), and before long, I needed to get into bed. At that moment, Pia asked if she could see a friend. Now that she was in the city, everyone was coming by to see her. I could hear kids calling her name from the street. "Pia! Pia!" So, as we'd just been into town, anyway, and I was going to bed, I decided to let her go. Well, this was the biggest mistake I ever made. Pia being out in Aix with a mother who had just arrived from Florida was like the shot heard around the world. When I woke up, there were all kinds of texts coming through. Some of Pia's friends were angry. Mom's who were trying to understand why I let her do that. Oh, it wasn't good. So, from the minute I woke up on that first day, we spent a lot of time explaining ourselves. It was not a smooth entry.
That first week was great but difficult. It was so nice to see Pia, but she, of course, really wanted to see her friends. I finally came to a compromise, and I told her that her best friend could come over, but they had to stay on opposite sides of the street which is only about 6 feet apart. This worked, and it appeased everyone.
The two week quarantine finally ended and just as it did, so did the lockdown in Morocco. My husband texted me to let me know that he was coming to France and would be taking Pia to the beach for one week. Okay, fair enough. He hadn't seen Pia since February. .When they left for the beach, I was alone and without a car. In the beginning, this was okay. I wandered around Aix and got my bearings. I found the supermarket, got a few things for the apartment, and did a lot of reading about what was going on around here. The week went quickly by and before long they were all back and Pia’s friend was also with us for one week. During this time, Nic and I went searching for a car. We finally found one and it we spent a few days doing errands and practicing parking in our very tiny garage. This was (and still is) a tricky maneuver. We did it as many times as possible until I finally got it right. One inch off on either side and there was trouble. .I finally got it and was so excited! The excitement wouldn’t last long, as the next day, Nic took Pia off to Brittany for two weeks. He has a lot of family and friends there. So, here, I sat, in Aix. No car, no friends, and very quickly losing my interest in wandering around the streets. It is beautiful here but in the summer it is very hot. I learned quickly that being outside in the afternoon was just too hot. Also, there were many European tourists. The markets were packed, and the museums were full, I decided that it was best to stay away from these crowds and spent.a lot of time indoors with Netflix. . The best place to be in the summer, like anywhere, is the beach or outside at a pool. Neither of which was an option for me. I felt stuck. I looked into taking a bus and I thought about taking an Uber. Finally, I gave up and decided that even the beach was going to be super crowded. I decided to join an online writing workshop, take an online photography course and I joined an Italian conversation group during the day. In the evening I would walk around and take pictures. It was less crowded and the air was a perfect temperature. I even found an expat drink evening via Meetup and went to that. I don’t drink but it was an attempt at seeing other human beings, who spoke English!. It was okay, but most people were away for the summer. I looked for tours to do, but most things were booked until the end of August. Feeling alone
In conclusion, I can’t help but reflect on the beautiful year I had in Florida. I was creating a new life for myself and I loved living there. Now, I am alone and confined. I have no friends and no way to move around. I have hardly had a breath of fresh air, as it’s so hot and I’m in a city. It has been long and isolating and I’m once again living in a foreign country. Yes, I speak French but it is not my language and sometimes I’m just not in the mood. I’m tired. I have many questions about my life and which direction it's heading but, for now, I know why I’m here and I know this is where I belong I must do this for Pia and I will do it with a smile on my face.
It's off my chest!