A letter to an old Friend
This is a letter I wrote to an old friend who found me on Facebook about one year ago. I had not seen him since 1986. He asked me how I’d ended up in France. Well, as anyone that knows me knows, there is no short answer. He really liked the letter so I thought I’d share for anyone else who’s every wondered how I got here. This is a very abridged version of my life over the past 35 years or so. I wrote this at 3 in the morning.
Hi Friend,
Well, I’m awake so here you go…..
In 1988 I met and married a French guy who was in Boston for one year on an exchange program. His name was Nic. Still is 😂. We married 8 months after we met and shortly after the wedding he went back to France to do his military service which was mandatory back then. I joined him for one month before he headed off to Grenoble. This is where he was stationed and was part of the alpine troops.
It was my first time in Europe. Who knew that my life would end up over here? After my time in France, I returned to Boston and worked as much as I could to pass the time away. After one year, Nic came back and we managed to stay there for about 2 years. He ended up working for an elderly French man who had an accessories business and worked with fashion designers. It was very random but it was a job and Nicolas really liked it. At some point, he asked Nic to move to Paris and take charge of the Paris office. It seemed like a good opportunity. I was working for Cosmair in the Ralph Lauren cosmetic division and I was pretty burnt out running perfume bottles all over New England. We jumped at the chance. I thought it would be a couple of years and an opportunity to learn French. I would never come back.
As it turned out, I was pregnant when I arrived in Paris, so my life started like that. No crazy parties and nightclubbing for me. I was doing my best to cross town to get to school every day on the metro as I attempted to learn French. It was so hard for me. I never thought I’d do it. I don’t think it helped that my French family and friends were always asking me how it was going and for a long time…..it wasn’t. I would sit in silence for hours as they all babbled on about the wine, cheese and usually “Les Etats Unis”. Those grueling hours around a French table that never seem to end. I love it now. I hated it then.
We stayed in Paris for about 3 years (Levallois Perret to be exact). I had 2 babies and things at the new company were not great. We considered moving back to Boston but in the end Nic landed a job with a big sports brand and that’s when everything changed, We would end up moving many times in the years that followed
With his new job, we left Paris and went down to Beaune, which is in the region of Burgundy. This was amazing. Beaune is a beautiful town and it was such a break from big city life. We had a little house and a view of the vineyards. What could be better? I learned a lot about wine and it was at that time that my French started to improve. We were there for one year.
We summered every year on Cape Cod with my parents in New Seabury. For awhile it seemed that we’d go to the Cape in the summer and return to a new town/home, in France. It was nuts but exciting.
After Beaune we went back to Paris and lived in a suburb in the north. A pretty town called L’isle Adam. It was a cute village town but a bit of a let down after experiencing the beautiful life in Burgundy. We stayed there for one year and then we moved to Lille for one year. This would be our last year in France because next we moved to Amsterdam.
Moving to Amsterdam was a new adventure and we were very excited about it. It was a break for me as I could speak English again. The kids went to an International school and we made lots of friends from all over the world. I even made a lot of French friends and it was in Amsterdam that my French really improved. These French girls only wanted to speak French. LOL.
After three years in Amsterdam, we moved to Newcastle, England. Living in England was a blast. I loved the people in Newcastle. We had so much fun. Alas, this time would go quickly by and after 3 years we were on the move back to Amsterdam.
This was great for the girls as we stayed for eight years this time. They were able to do all of junior high and high school in the same school. It was a nice life and it was good to be settled for a time.
I forgot to mention that I had another baby (I was 40) when we were in Newcastle. So with a 10/12 year age gap, I was juggling 2 teenagers and a toddler. Life was busy.
After 8 years, both older girls had moved out of the house and Nic found a job working in Lugano, Switzerland. I felt like I’d died and gone to heaven. Lugano was absolutely the most beautiful place I’d ever seen. We lived on a lake, everyone spoke Italian and the weather was just perfect. In the winter we walked amongst palm trees in a very mild climate, as we admired the snow capped mountains in the distance. It was blissful. My daughter, Pia, ended up going to the local school where she became fluent in Italian. It was a sweet life and very simple.
This, unfortunately would only last 2 years as Nic was offered a job in Dubai. So, off we went to experience life in the Middle East. Dubai turned out to be loads of fun. . Life was easy, the weather was amazing and there were tons of international families there. Every weekend felt like vacation. We’d party on boats, hang at the beach and go to all the many bars, restaurant and night clubs that Dubai is known for. I really enjoyed it. Nic hated his job. So, 2 years later, he found a job which was based in Morocco. For the first time, I couldn’t find the excitement in this move. We discussed the idea of me and Pia moving to France and him commuting. He wanted us to go and see, so after a short visit to Casablanca, we all decided that it seemed okay and that maybe living there would be better than we thought. We found a really beautiful house and Pia went to the American school. This turned out to be the most difficult experience that any of my children had to adapt to. The American school was basically a school filled with elite Moroccans. Many of whom held American passports. Hmmmm. Pia was the only kid in her grade that wasn’t from there. They were awful to her. She felt really isolated in Morocco She did make friends, in the end, but it was tough. This is when we decided that boarding school was a good idea. She had 4 years to go and with all of the moving, we wanted her to have the opportunity to belong somewhere. Not only that but she really wanted to go. She and I visited a school in Aix-en-Provence and she really liked it. It was a big step and we were really proud of her. We, of course, didn’t want her to go but it was best for her.
She left and there I was, alone in Casablanca. I was teaching English and this kept me very busy but I just didn’t want to be there anymore. Morocco is really interesting on vacation but it was very exhausting to live there. The poverty, the men chasing you everywhere and just the constant harassment. The Moroccans are very nice people but they are not my people. Nic was always away and in the end, we decided to separate. It was a difficult decision but we had grown apart and I wanted to go home.
So, last year, I moved to Sarasota, Florida. I put a pin on the map and found my little piece of heaven. I loved it there but it, too would be short lived as corona virus appeared and Pia was suddenly alone in France. School closed as did the boarding house. She was invited by host families while we figured out what to do. The Moroccan boarders were closed so Pia couldn’t go there and Nic couldn’t get out. I am not French so couldn’t just jump on a plane to come over. It was crazy. We did figure it out and once we got all of the necessary paperwork for me to come over here, I was on the first plane out. I’ve been here since July 1. It was the right decision and it’s great to be with Pia again. I get 2 more years with her. It has been difficult for me but I know that when this is all over, good times are coming my way.
Aix is beautiful and I’m trying to make the most of it. I am completely alone here and there’s no way to meet anyone as everything is closed. I have met a couple of gals who like to hike so hopefully we can do that again as soon as they’ve just lifted the restrictions.
There you go, Friend. Our virtual beach day. There is so much more but as you can see, there was no short answer.